Pantone Color Of The Year 2025
They're calling it Mocha Mousse, but we all know what it really is
Last Thursday Pantone announced their Color Of The Year 2025: Mocha Mousse.
That’s a very polite way of saying shit. Because we all know that color is shit, and that 2025 is shaping up to be a pile of shit, and that we’re all just pieces of shit living our stupid shithead existences in this shithole of a universe.
Yet I like what Pantone did here. They took an ugly, ass-wipe shade of brown (that looks suspiciously like a bowl of bear diarrhea) and gave it a dignified title. How very clever. Refreshing even. I mean, if we have to wade through this muck for a lifetime, might as well make the best of it, right? Stay positive everyone, this isn’t shit we’re shoveling down your throat, it’s Mocha Mousse!
I’ve always wanted to work for a paint company and be the Color Namer Writer Person (I should probably figure out the correct title) and so I’ve taken inspiration from Pantone and given myself an assignment (ass): create 40 shades of brown each with a title evocative of shit, but doesn’t actually say it.
(I chose forty colors, by the way, because forty rhymes with farty. Also because Genesis 7:4: “Seven days from now I will send rain on the earth for forty days and forty nights, and I will wipe from the face of the earth every living creature I have made.” You think I’m being negative, god thinks we’re so shitty he flushed us down the toilet.)
So here are 40 very shitty colors I have designed for Pantone’s Color Of The Year 2026, 2027, etc. because I don’t foresee things getting any less shitty any time soon.
Haha! Still very funny, Dave!
Full diaper!